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Friday, October 31, 2014

Thursday, October 30, 2014

All About That Bass

All About That Bass
http://fc00.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/147/4/f/bass_ic_notes_of_music_by_webwhammy-d66qwri.gif
The Band:
Kate Davis - vocals and upright bass
Dave Tedeschi - drums
Scott Bradlee - piano




So, this one is pretty self-explainatory. 
The incredibly talented young performer you are watching is Kate Davis, and she’s the real deal. Not only does she possess the kind of voice that will take you back to the days of Billie Holiday, but she can also shred on the upright bass. 

"All About That Bass"

Because you know
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass

Yeah, it's pretty clear, I ain't no size two
But I can shake it, shake it
Like I'm supposed to do
'Cause I got that boom boom that all the boys chase
And all the right junk in all the right places

I see the magazine workin' that Photoshop
We know that stuff ain't real
C'mon now, make it stop
If you got beauty, beauty, just raise 'em up
'Cause every inch of you is perfect
From the bottom to the top

Yeah, my mama she told me don't worry about your size
She says, "Boys like a little more booty to hold at night."
You know I won't be no stick figure silicone Barbie doll
So if that's what you're into then go ahead and move along

Because you know I'm
All about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass
Hey!

I'm bringing booty back
Go ahead and tell them skinny bitches that
No I'm just playing. I know you think you're fat
But I'm here to tell ya
Every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top

Yeah my mama she told me don't worry about your size
She says, "Boys like a little more booty to hold at night."
You know I won't be no stick figure silicone Barbie doll
So if that's what you're into then go ahead and move along

Because you know I'm
All about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass

Because you know I'm
All about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass

Because you know I'm
All about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass, no treble
I'm all about that bass
'Bout that bass
'Bout that bass, 'bout that bass
Hey, hey, ooh
You know you like this bass


You know what to do, internet - let’s make her famous, because she deserves it. 

Find her on Facebook here: http://www.facebook.com/katedavismusic 


The Band:
Kate Davis - vocals and upright bass http://www.twitter.com/katedavismusic
Dave Tedeschi - drums http://davetedeschi.com
Scott Bradlee - piano http://www.instagram.com/scottbradlee

PMJ on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/postmodernju...

Get this song on our new album: http://msclvr.co/F8WmMC
Postmodern Jukebox Tour Tix: http://tickets.turnupgroup.com/postmo...
 
My Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/scottbradlee

http://fc00.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/147/4/f/bass_ic_notes_of_music_by_webwhammy-d66qwri.gif

All About That Bass Parody = I Like To Be The Boss

I LIKE TO BE THE BOSS

It's All About That Bass Parody



*

I Like To Be The Boss LYRICS

Because you all know
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss

Yeah, it’s pretty clear, I ain’t no stepford wife
I like to speak up
My skirts a little tight
Cause I got that fiestyness, my hubby seems to like
And all the right moves to keeping my body tight

I see the magazines, teaching you how to cook
But if you want a man
Then you don’t need no book
If you got brains & beauty, just raise-em up
Cause its more attractive when
You make it to the top

Yeah, my mama told me don’t worry bout his pocket size
She says you work on yourself
So you’ll always be alright
You know I won’t be no puppet that sits there and bats her eyes
So if that’s what your into you might as well not even try

Because
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss

I’m bringing bossy back
Go ahead tell submissive wifeys that
No I’m just playing, I know you think I’m whack
But I’m here to tell you that your opinion’s always perfect

And men like a little sass.

Yeah, my mama told me don’t worry bout his pocket size
She says you work on yourself
So you’ll always be alright
You know I won’t be no puppet that sits there and bats her eyes
So if that’s what your into you might as well not even try

Because you know
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss

Because you know
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss

Because you know
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss, don’t argue
I like to be the boss
Be the boss


Directed and Edited by: Matt Yoakum
Produced by: Rebecca Zamolo
Song written by: Rebecca Zamolo
Vocals by: Ana Free
Choreography by: Katie Taylor
BTS: Megan Butler
Photography By: Kelly Lee
http://www.mulberrytreedesign.com


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Wednesday, October 29, 2014

All About That Bass Parody = "I Just Need Some Space"

https://33.media.tumblr.com/efa4c6716f72373c47e73694f2e0ef66/tumblr_ngl18uaybC1sqsyybo5_400.gif 
 "I Just Need Some Space"
All About That Bass Parody


 

Here are the lyrics:

Because you know I just need some space
Need some space, you’re in trouble
Get off the bookcase, bookcase your in trouble
What’s that on your face, on your face you’re in trouble
I just need some space, need some space

Yeah it’s pretty clear, I got these two
But I can’t take it, take it, like I’m supposed to do
Got same problems that all the moms face
All of their junk all over my spaces

Just want to read a magazine, rock my muffintop
Are these kids for real
Come on now make it stop
If you got little cuties, just give it up
‘Cause every inch of you is covered
From the bottom to the top

I am your mama I told you to go outside
(Oooo bop bop, shadoo bop bop)
I really need to find a better place to hide
(Not in the closet, not in the closet)
No I can’t find your teddy or Legos or Barbie doll
(Oooo bop bop, shadoo bop bop)
So excuse me I’m going pee
Now go ahead and move along

Because you know I just need some space, need some space
You’re in trouble
Get your foot out of my face, out my face
You’re in trouble
That’s my pillowcase, pillowcase
You’re in trouble
I just need some space, need some space

I said put it back
You don’t listen to a word I say
I know you’re playing but it’s time for bath
I’m here to tell you
Every inch of you is covered from the bottom to the top

I am your mama I told you to come inside
Don’t make me yell cause I’m feelin’ freakin’ fried
(Freakin’ fried, freakin’ fried)
No I can’t read that book for the fifteen millionth time
(Ooo bop bop, shadoo bop bop)
So just put down the glitter glue
And go ahead and move along

Because you know I just need some space, need some space
You’re in trouble
Can’t keep up this pace, up this pace
I’m in trouble
Use the staircase, staircase
You’re in trouble
I just need some space, need some space

Because you know I just need some space
Need some space
You’re in trouble
Get out of the fireplace, fireplace
You’re in trouble
You just broke my vase, broke my vase
You’re in trouble
I just need some space, need some space

Because you know I just need some space, need some space
You’re in trouble
Get out of the suitcase, suitcase
You’re in trouble
I just need some space, need some space
You’re in trouble
I just need some space, need some space

Hey, hey hey
Woo hoo
You know, you know I do
Hey
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Tuesday, October 28, 2014

All About That Bass Parody = Bitch in Business

Bitch in Business
All About That Bass Parody



x

Act like a man, get called a bitch. A love letter to all the badass bitches who aren’t afraid to be themselves in the business world #BiB

Made by Columbia Business School students. You can download the track here:

Lyrics:
“She's really talented, but she comes on too strong and should be less abrasive.”
“C'mon sweetheart, but a smile on that face!”
“People find your tone a little off-putting, you should try to be warmer and more nurturing.”
“Man, the way she wouldn't budge on that part of the contract, she was being a real…”
“BITCH”

Because c'mon
You know that I'm a bitch
I'm a bitch, in business
You know that I'm a bitch
I'm a bitch, in business
You know that I'm a bitch
I'm a bitch, in business
You know that I'm a bitch
Bitch in Charge

Yeah, it's pretty clear, that I'm not a dude
And I'm told acting like one
Isn't what ladies do
But I'm tough as nails and I'll fight for my side
Gettin’ called bitch means I'm doing something right

I'm getting those returns, and making fat stacks
Making these suits look good
While I close the wage gap
But here is some fair warning, you should know that
I'm a viper in the boardroom
And a tiger in the sack

Yeah, my mama, she told me, that boys prefer girls who smile
Don't worry about brains, just twerk those feminine wiles
You know I won't be no soft-spoken timid doormat cliché
Because the harder I work, then the harder I get to play

Because c'mon
You know that I'm a bitch
I'm a bitch bottle poppin
You know that I'm a bitch
I'm a bitch, briefs droppin
You know that I'm a bitch
I'm a bitch, in business
You know that I'm a bitch
Bitch In Charge
*slaps an ass*

Glass ceiling's gonna fall
Because I'm a goddamn human wrecking ball
Don't make me mute you on this conference call
My time is money and
Bitch I won't be resting until my name is on the wall

Yeah I don't have a dick but that doesn't make me a fool
See girls acing their classes at med law and b-schools
But you old boys who are worried women might challenge your throne
You should know you are making your chromosome look small on'yur own

BOASTFUL RAP:
Let me take a moment to clarify what I'm sayin'
I'm a dope ass bitch and in business I'm stayin'
Well qualified but I don't get respected
Maybe they're just jealous cuz my nuts are well protected
You say "Babies are for girls! Business is for boys!"
Try telling THAT to my stay-at-home fuck toy
No time to worry about having it all, cuz
I'm a bitch in business just swingin’ my balls

Made of sugar and spice and everything nice
And gun powder and cubans, and burbon no ice
When we pitch a business get a fraction of the cash
But I'll launch half the startups and kick all the ass
To those who fear a female with authority
Guess I don't need a hand-mirror to look at a pussy
All hail the queen and keep your hands off of my crown
Cuz a piss is the only thing that I'll take sitting down

Because c'mon
You know that I'm a bitch
I'm a bitch, deal slingin’
You know that I'm a bitch
I'm a bitch, eggs freezin’
You know that I'm a bitch
I'm a bitch in business.
You know that I'm a bitch
Bitch in charge
Bad bitch in charge
Hey, hey, ooh
You know you love this bitch.

vvv

Feminist 'All About That Bass' Parody 
"Bitch In Business"
 Might Be Better Than The Original
 
By Alanna Vagianos

While Meghan Trainor's hit "All About That Bass" celebrates body confidence, a new feminist parody takes more of an intellectual approach to equality.

Created by three Columbia Business School students, "Bitch In Business" puts a feminist manifesto to the tune of Trainor's "All About That Bass." The students, who are part of a group called the CBS Follies, describe the video as "a love letter to all the badass bitches who aren’t afraid to be themselves in the business world."

The video itself is a bit sharper than Trainor's pastel-filled, hip-shaking video, and even includes a few slightly NSFW lines, such as: "You say 'Babies are for girls! Business is for boys!'/Try telling THAT to my stay-at-home fuck toy." Other amazing one-liners include, "Making these suits look good while I close the wage gap," and "Gettin’ called bitch means I'm doing something right." Preach.

It's no secret that sexism is alive and well in the business world (along with many, many other industries). If a woman is viewed as too "abrasive" or too "pushy" she runs the risk of being labelled a bitch, but those same qualities in a man might brand him as a strong leader. Everyday sexism at its finest.

We still suggest you play this before any and every upcoming interview.


xxxx

Saturday, October 25, 2014

The 10 Best Bagel Shops In NYC

The 10 Best Bagel Shops
In NYC
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This isn't the first time Gothamist has rounded up the best of this city's myriad bagel offerings, but last year's Bagel Power Ranking caused so much controversy we decided we needed to come back and settle this once and for all. So gather your pitchforks and torches: what follows are our favorite bagel joints in the city—leave your recommendations and your requests to send us back to Montana (we are not from there, FYI) or wherever in the comments.


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ABSOLUTE BAGELS
With fellow bagel standby H&H Bagels long gone, this uptown joint is the new neighborhood king, selling crispy-skinned, light and chewy bagels to the hordes of Upper West Siders and hungover Columbia students that line up outside on weekend mornings. Individual bagels run about $1, and you can pair them with an assortment of standard cream cheeses, meats and spreads; do note that while the bagels are delectable, they don't hold up to snuff after a few hours, so it's best to consume them ASAP. Cash only.

Absolute Bagels is located at 2788 Broadway between 107th and 108th Street in Manhattan Valley (212-932-2052, absolutebagels.com).


022514_bagelhole.jpg

THE BAGEL HOLE
Mayor de Blasio once proclaimed Bagel Hole the best in the city, and while #forkgate didn't do much to bolster his cred among NYC foodiots, he managed to get this one right. Bagel Hole's goods are always fresh, dense and chewy, enveloped by the necessary salty, crispy skin. And though they get some flack for being on the small side, that's how bagels are supposed to be, a truth that has gotten lost somewhere among the massive dough balls which lesser bagelries have been churning out in recent years. Eat with cream cheese, whitefish, lox or nothing, dream of flocks of angels crowned by bagel halos all night long.

The Bagel Hole is located at 400 Seventh Avenue between 12th and 13th Street in Park Slope, Brooklyn (718-788-4014, bagelhole.net).


022514_terrace.jpg

TERRACE BAGELS: 
Though the jury's still out on Terrace Bagels' highly controversial recent redesign, this Windsor Terrace spot continues to produce some of the most solid bagels in all of Kings County...and therefore the WORLD. These ever-fresh fluffy offerings are best when doused with a healthy serving of house-made flavored cream cheese or sandwiching sliced turkey and mustard. Plus, there's no need to get them toasted; just slap on a spread and head out to nearby Prospect Park with your breakfast/lunch/midday snack, assuming the sky has stopped winter-crying.

Terrace Bagels is located at 224 Prospect Park West between 16th Street and Windsor Place in Windsor Terrace, Brooklyn (718-768-3943).



022514_essa.jpg

ESS-A-BAGEL: 
Like Bagel Hole, there's been some controversy over the size of Ess-A-Bagel's dough halos. Some claim Ess-A-Bagel's offerings are too big. We beg to differ, and will continue to indulge in a crispy, colossal everything bagel loaded with scallion cream cheese, lox and tomato. We will then breathe in your face on the 4 train, our dispelled carbon monoxide pungent with pure satisfaction and the noxious fumes of fish and onion. Suck it, haters.

Ess-A-Bagel has two locations in Manhattan: 359 1st Ave at 21st Street in Gramercy (212-260-2252, ess-a-bagel.com) and at 831 3rd Ave between 50th and 51st Street in Midtown East (212-980-1010, ess-a-bagel.com).




022514_davids.jpg



DAVID'S BAGELS:
The Gramercy/East Village/Stuy Town dwellers have long since fought over whether David's or Ess-A-Bagel boils a better bagel. And while Ess-A is one of the best bagelries in town (see above), David's is some pretty solid competition, boasting tasty, chewy bagels that somehow manage to stay hot all day. You can't go wrong with a basic bagel-and-cream cheese type deal, but we've been told their egg-and-cheese concoctions are superior to all other egg-and-cheeses in the city; with that information in hand, do what you will.

David's Bagels is located at 273 1st Ave between 16th and 17th Street in Gramercy (212- 780-2308, davidsbagelsnyc.com).




022514_murrays.jpg

MURRAY'S BAGELS: 
I don't have a particularly great bagel place in my neighborhood, which is probably a good thing, lest I turn into a giant sesame seed. But whenever I'm gripped with the urge to sink my teeth into something dense and carby (usually after a night out at one of these guys), I will make the pilgrimage out to this Greenwich Village spot, still holding strong after nearly 20 years in service. Though some turn their noses up at Murray's' no-toast policy, fresh bagels should never be toasted; that charring is reserved for day-old bread and those horrible faux-bagels packaged in plastic and sold in suburban supermarkets. Get a damn non-toasted everything bagel with lox spread; you're in the BIG LEAGUES now.

Murray's Bagels is located at 500 6th Ave between 12th and 13th Streets in Greenwich Village (212-462-2830, murraysbagels.com).




022514_bageloasis.jpg


BAGEL OASIS
 Brooklyn might boast a more notable bagel rep, but this Queens joint will give Kings County and its "famed" bagel water a run for its money. Bagels here come thickly spread with homemade cream cheeses, and though they do toast their goods (FOR SHAME!) they won't reduce your cinnamon raisin pick to a charred, tasteless mess. Bonus points: Bagel Oasis is open 24/7, so if you happen to have a hankering for some late-night grub and you're nowhere near one of these places, you can still get your hands on a stellar bagel-and-turkey deal.

Bagel Oasis is located at 18312 Horace Harding Expressway in Fresh Meadows, Queens (718-359-9245, bageloasis.com).




0222514_kossars.jpg

KOSSAR'S BIALYS
 This LES institution may be famed for its namesake bialys, but the 90 cent bagels here are nothing to sneer at, either. Like H&H—forever a curse on you, Verizon Wireless—Kossar's does not bother with trifling things like condiments and cream cheese. If you want a bagel, buy a bagel, and if you want cream cheese, they sell tubs of Philadelphia at the Key Foods near the Williamsburg Bridge (they sell tubs of cream cheese in-store, but it's cheaper to buy your own preferred brand).

Of course, if you're feeling "adventurous" you can't go wrong with a bialy—a pillowy round thing that looks a little bit like a bagel but will SURPRISE YOU when you bite into it and are overcome by the taste of onion—or try the "pletzel," a savory, foccacia-esque flatbread.

Kossar's Bialys is located at 367 Grand Street between Essex and Norfolk Streets on the Lower East Side (212-473-4810, kossarsbialys.com).




022514_bergen.jpg

BERGEN BAGELS:  
An anonymous Gothamist staffer who is enraptured by this Prospect Heights bagelry describes its offerings as "normal bagels that got dipped in superpowers." While the bagels themselves are fairly standard fare for NY and NJ (yes, there are good bagels in NJ), when it comes to the spreads, Bergen Bagels hits the mark. The Bergen Street location boasts everything from dill cream cheese to feta pesto cream cheese to Japanese tuna spread to Chipotle-lime chicken, and just about everything you ask them to put on your bagel will be delicious and fresh.

Bergen Bagels is located at 473 Bergen Street between 5th and 6th Aves in Prospect Heights, Brooklyn (718-789-7600, bergenbagel.com). There are two other locations in Brooklyn, but this one is the best.




022514_brooklyn.jpg

BROOKLYN BAGEL & COFFEE COMPANY: 
Ironically, Brooklyn Bagel does not have a location in Brooklyn. It does, however, have three locations in Astoria and one in Chelsea, and every one of them sells spectacular hand-rolled doughy bagels, appropriately crispy-skinned and accompanied by what seems like thousands of spreads and proteins. They have a flavor-of-the-week cream cheese that has, at times, been cannoli cream, red velvet, spinach and white chocolate raspberry. Expect long lines in Astoria on weekday mornings, but your breakfast will be worth the wait.

Brooklyn Bagel has three locations in Queens and one in Manhattan; visit their website for details.


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5 Best Bagel Shops
in the United States

Ah, bagels. I know many (myself included) that will travel far and wide for the best bagel. There are infinite reasons as to why I think bagels are supreme, but getting into that would take up this entire article. Anyway, if you’re looking for the best places around the U.S. to get bagels, here are some that can definitely help you find your bagel fix. While you’re visiting one of these locations, feel free to pick me up an everything with cream cheese, alright?

1. H&H Bagels Midtown Bagels East
 – New York, NY
 HH
 If you’ve searched for the best bagel in NYC, this is probably where many will lead you. This spot has made cameos in Seinfeld, and also serve as the “sympathy bagels” Carrie brings Miranda in Sex and the City  after not being able to help her when she threw out her back. It has recently closed, but has plans of renovating and reopening under new ownership. A review on Yelp said it best: “My first bite of an H&H bagel resulted in a complete paradigm shift, in which I finally understood why NYC is known for its bagels. I didn’t know that bagels could reach such heights as this.”
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2. Sam’s Bagels 
– Los Angeles, CA
sams_bagelsg

For more than 35 years, this location has been serving up some of the best bagels in LA. The spot has a reputation of having a long wait, but it’s well worth their perfect bagels. Their garlic bagels are what they’ve gotten the best reviews for, as well as having fresh lox.

3. BB’s Bagels 
– Alpharetta, GA
bb-s-bagels

BB’s is about thirty miles north of Atlanta, but is still one of the most popular bagel places in the country. From friends who have experienced their bagels firsthand, they all describe them as “revolutionary to the bagel game.”  The bagels are hand-rolled and kettle-boiled, and they have fresh bialys on the weekends.


4.  New England Bagel 
– Manchester, NH
NE Bagel
New England Bagel is known for its fresh bagels and its breakfast sandwiches. Getting a bacon, egg and cheese outside of the NYC area is usually against all my principles, but this is definitely a place where I know I can get one of the best in the states.


5. The Bagel Man
 – Phoenix, AZ
thumb_600
This spot makes its own cream cheeses, which is highly recommended by those who frequent this spot. Everything is fresh and made to to order, and they’re known for having a friendly staff.


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Where do you buy the best bagels?
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Saturday, October 4, 2014

Coffee and Espresso Drinks Explained

Coffee   and   Espresso
Drinks Explained
 
When it comes to getting caffeinated, these days we've got options. Gone are the days of picking only between a cup of decaf or regular. Now we're faced with an array of coffee beans that come from all over the globe, a handful of specialized ways to brew a regular cup of coffee, and enough options of espresso drinks to make your head spin. Coffee has gotten an upgrade. And while we're not complaining, the truth is that getting a cup of joe has gotten a little more complicated.

This new coffee culture only means good things for us caffeine fiends, but it also means that we need to stay on top of what's what. To help you figure out how to order a cup in this coffee-saturated world, read on. We've broken down the best espresso drinks, so that you can always get just the shot of caffeine you're looking for.




Cappucino
 
One of the most popular espresso drinks, a cappucino done right should be equal parts espresso, steamed milk and foamed milk (about 60 ml each).




Mocha
 
With 60 ml of espresso, 60 ml of chocolate and 30 ml of steamed milk, a mocha is a the right choice if you want something sweet.




Latte
 
The latte gets its name because it's full of milk. It is generally just a 60 ml shot of espresso with 300 ml steamed milk -- and only 2ml foamed milk.




Cafe au Lait
 

If you prefer brewed coffee over espresso, cafe au lait is for you. It's just a pampered cup of coffee -- calling for warm, steamed milk in place of cold milk. 





Americano
 
If you like the taste of espresso, but don't like how quickly it goes you'd be happy with an Americano. It's a shot of espresso (30 ml) with twice the amount of water (60 ml). 





Cafe Noisette
 
The noisette is one step between the machiatto and the latte. It's a big shot of espresso with half of that amount in hot milk.





Macchiato
 
With a macchiato you get a shot of espresso (or sometimes two) with just a dot of foamed milk.




Doppio
 
Doppio means double in Italian, and that's exactly what you get with espresso. Rather than the expected 30 ml shot of espresso, a doppio gets you a 60 ml shot.

 


Espresso
 
A small shot of caffeine -- but more than enough to get the job done -- usually about 30 ml.




Ristretto


A ristretto is the coffee choice for those who like to get straight to the point. It's a very concentrated espresso shot -- only 22 ml.

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